it's pretty crazy.
at this point, I can see that i have more than i had just a few weeks ago. I'm thinking back to school of worship, and my cry was to have more. And now, I can see it.
God totally increased revelation in my life, it is normal to get a life-changing revelation... all the time.
---
"There is a crack in everything, that's how the light gets in." - Leonard Cohen
I just read that off my friend's quotes on FB. They smoke and they know it's bad, but they really want to quit.
A nation can be saved in one day. And a son that is willing to rise up and be himself is all that we need to see people multiplied in the kingdom.
---
There is a huge increase of His presence, I just notice it now. I remember Bill talking about worship, how it's really about those times we have to recognize when we need to just stop and worship. I've been having those more and more, where God interjects randomly during the day, and i just stop. and gaze.
More!
listening to ALIVE - Ian McIntosh. Amazing album.
Friday, July 31, 2009
What has been put inside of me...
so i randomly signed up to work at this camp called camp wa-sta-hi (stands for water/stars/hills. It was so random i found it on facebook marketplace. It coincided with JesusCulture, but for some reason, I had a much stronger desire to go to this camp instead. I ended up applying, got an interview, which was totally God too, and then this past week i went to camp.
The people there are amazing, the counselors are fun, and fully involved with this camp madness. Singing songs, doing the skits...They seem like the most normal counselors, like people that I could really relate to.
We got back this afternoon, and i just got back from a "BBQ" with the counselors (about 10 total). They're all really young, from 18 to 27, so i was among the youngest. When i get there, they're all already drinking and just anything you'd expect to see at a college frat party. Their jokes are off the wall.. they're funny, just not the kind of humor i'd actually enjoy. Literally, i was the only one there that was straight up "i don't drink", it was cool, cause there wasn't really a stigma attached to it. I liked how they were completely ok, they had built relationship with me for a week prior, so the fact that i didn't live out the same lifestyle they did, didn't affect our relationship (this is foreign to the western church).
I spent almost a good 4 hours with a bunch of drunks playing booze games, taking shots of tequila and rum with their limes. I didn't really join in, because i think beer tastes like crap.... but it was interesting to watch them. While i was driving home, i recollected on the week. God's really been opening my eyes to see His heart for people. During the week at camp, He told me, "I can't wait to show them how good I Am". I knew that wouldn't happen unless i stewarded the heaven that He had given me. all throughout the week i watched opportunity pass me by and by. There were so many chances for me to invade the impossible, yet my feet stood. I ended up operating covertly, release the presence where i went, making lanyards as gifts of favor on their lives.
I operated covertly, and i can say it was good, but it wasn't best. As i was driving home, I felt His heart for His family. He longs soooo much for them. Even at the bbq, one of the guys does tarot card readings, and when he said, "who wants a tarot reading?" most of them would say me! me! My citizenship in heaven arose in me, and I started thinking, 'dude i could totally blast them away and throttle them towards their destinies with just a prophetic word. Those tarot cards got nothing.' These people are hungry for the supernatural, they want something genuine, they hate the religious, they don't want words, they want to know who they are. Only people who know they are, have the ability to show other people who they are. If you don't know who you are, you have no right to tell people who they are... because you have no understanding of your own identity, how can you point someone elses to theirs?
I've found my identity, the realm of possibility has exploded in me, what have i done to steward it?
In my car, I decided that today, I am no longer the same. I can no longer afford to not be myself. The "myself" that is in me is a monstrous man of God who is as bold as a lion, and walks in earthquaking power. That man hears the voice, that man has all the faith in the world, that man is alive, that man is a lover, that man knows his Father, that man knows Love, and that man receives and gives Love. That man can only be hindered by me. And that man has the power to use me, instead of me using that man. That man has the power of 'me-control' and can let 'myself' be 'myself' without 'me' stopping that man.
I have lost total confidence in 'me', and have moved all of that confidence in who He says I am. Because He is faithful, true. He is full of faith, and He is Truth. He is my Father, and I am His son. I am His, He is mine.
I can't afford to be 'me'. 'Me' can't give the world an encounter with Jesus. Only if I be myself will the light of Christ shine like a lighthouse, piercing miles... through the night clouds of the sea.
Jesus!
The people there are amazing, the counselors are fun, and fully involved with this camp madness. Singing songs, doing the skits...They seem like the most normal counselors, like people that I could really relate to.
We got back this afternoon, and i just got back from a "BBQ" with the counselors (about 10 total). They're all really young, from 18 to 27, so i was among the youngest. When i get there, they're all already drinking and just anything you'd expect to see at a college frat party. Their jokes are off the wall.. they're funny, just not the kind of humor i'd actually enjoy. Literally, i was the only one there that was straight up "i don't drink", it was cool, cause there wasn't really a stigma attached to it. I liked how they were completely ok, they had built relationship with me for a week prior, so the fact that i didn't live out the same lifestyle they did, didn't affect our relationship (this is foreign to the western church).
I spent almost a good 4 hours with a bunch of drunks playing booze games, taking shots of tequila and rum with their limes. I didn't really join in, because i think beer tastes like crap.... but it was interesting to watch them. While i was driving home, i recollected on the week. God's really been opening my eyes to see His heart for people. During the week at camp, He told me, "I can't wait to show them how good I Am". I knew that wouldn't happen unless i stewarded the heaven that He had given me. all throughout the week i watched opportunity pass me by and by. There were so many chances for me to invade the impossible, yet my feet stood. I ended up operating covertly, release the presence where i went, making lanyards as gifts of favor on their lives.
I operated covertly, and i can say it was good, but it wasn't best. As i was driving home, I felt His heart for His family. He longs soooo much for them. Even at the bbq, one of the guys does tarot card readings, and when he said, "who wants a tarot reading?" most of them would say me! me! My citizenship in heaven arose in me, and I started thinking, 'dude i could totally blast them away and throttle them towards their destinies with just a prophetic word. Those tarot cards got nothing.' These people are hungry for the supernatural, they want something genuine, they hate the religious, they don't want words, they want to know who they are. Only people who know they are, have the ability to show other people who they are. If you don't know who you are, you have no right to tell people who they are... because you have no understanding of your own identity, how can you point someone elses to theirs?
I've found my identity, the realm of possibility has exploded in me, what have i done to steward it?
In my car, I decided that today, I am no longer the same. I can no longer afford to not be myself. The "myself" that is in me is a monstrous man of God who is as bold as a lion, and walks in earthquaking power. That man hears the voice, that man has all the faith in the world, that man is alive, that man is a lover, that man knows his Father, that man knows Love, and that man receives and gives Love. That man can only be hindered by me. And that man has the power to use me, instead of me using that man. That man has the power of 'me-control' and can let 'myself' be 'myself' without 'me' stopping that man.
I have lost total confidence in 'me', and have moved all of that confidence in who He says I am. Because He is faithful, true. He is full of faith, and He is Truth. He is my Father, and I am His son. I am His, He is mine.
I can't afford to be 'me'. 'Me' can't give the world an encounter with Jesus. Only if I be myself will the light of Christ shine like a lighthouse, piercing miles... through the night clouds of the sea.
Jesus!
Monday, July 20, 2009
Thoughts
God teach me to sustain my walk. When ever I'm in school or in the future if i get a full time job, i already know that i don't know how to go deep into You during those times.
It's easy to seek You as I have so much time. Holy Spirit teach me to walk with you in those times.
It's easy to seek You as I have so much time. Holy Spirit teach me to walk with you in those times.
Saturday, July 18, 2009
Prophecying..
a note:
i'm writing this in hopes someone may read it. although, at the same time, my main purpose is to remind myself of what He's done, and have a record of what He's taught me.
---
Just read a chunk on Ultimate Treasure Hunt about the 12 year old.
"... so i figured since i was doing God's work, whatever thought came into my head was head was from God. So, when you asked if I had anything, I just said whatever first came to my mind."
To me, there's a huge revelation... this kid actually had faith. Not to say that the older BSSM students didn't. Someone said along the lines of ... most of your issues in life are trust issues. This 12 year old had a simple and profound trust in the Father, and it led to such great encouragement/fruit. It's an invitation to believe that ...He's THAT good. He's THAT faithful. He really is THAT good. Can you believe it?
Can i believe it? gonna it on this for a while.
Holy Spirit, please remind me about this word more often. It'll change my life!
i'm writing this in hopes someone may read it. although, at the same time, my main purpose is to remind myself of what He's done, and have a record of what He's taught me.
---
Just read a chunk on Ultimate Treasure Hunt about the 12 year old.
"... so i figured since i was doing God's work, whatever thought came into my head was head was from God. So, when you asked if I had anything, I just said whatever first came to my mind."
To me, there's a huge revelation... this kid actually had faith. Not to say that the older BSSM students didn't. Someone said along the lines of ... most of your issues in life are trust issues. This 12 year old had a simple and profound trust in the Father, and it led to such great encouragement/fruit. It's an invitation to believe that ...He's THAT good. He's THAT faithful. He really is THAT good. Can you believe it?
Can i believe it? gonna it on this for a while.
Holy Spirit, please remind me about this word more often. It'll change my life!
Thursday, July 16, 2009
What is my true purpose in life?
http://www.stevepavlina.com/blog/2005/01/how-to-discover-your-life-purpose-in-about-20-minutes/
I figured it out. took me 23 minutes.
What is my true purpose in life?
To live
To die
To jump around
To do nothing
To know people
To watch videos
To entertain myself
To pass time
To eat food
To think of something to do
To change the world to hurt people to make art to make music to judge people to look around to heal people to be free to feel good to hear myself talk to hear other people talk to help others to be different to change the world to be awesome to feel better than yesterday to see god to be god to be the best to be known to make money to have a good job to make money to be successful to eat food to take upsapce to travel to sightsee to give to the poor to hug trees to watch movies to find my purposeto go to bethel to see people get healed to see cancer dissolve to be with God to walk with God to be amazing to to read the word to play games to find joiy to find the woman of my dreams to be able to rest to be able to take a break to know why I am doing this to have all the answers to not be frustrated to constantly know my purpose to know why I am alive to know my direction to constantly know who I am and wha ti stand for to not compromise who I am to live according to who I know I am to change myself for the better to leave behind the things that hinder me from being myself to leave behind the things that keep me from living to leave behind the things that keep me from who I am to become to leave behind the things that distract me from living for a one goal to have a focused burn to burn passionately for one thing to be alive to be filled with hope to be filled with joy to be fully filled to be estatic with praise to see God to encounter him all the time to commune with him all the time to walk with him to know him like enoch to know him like adam to know him like my flesh toknow who he made me to be to know what is store for to know the best for me to know His best for me to know wha ti need to know to walk in who I am to be who I am and no one else to be satisfied with the process to have the peace that surpasses understanding when I don’t understand to be filled and overflowing with the spirit to never hinder the flow of the Spirit through me to walk in the revelations that have bene given to me to be bold to be fearless to have an unshakable unbreakable faith to realize that the spirit realm is more real than the natural to see in the spirit to see what is real to differentiate whwat is real aand what is more real to be able to show other people what I know for the sake of them finding their purpose to not be lost to know where I am and know where I am going to have direction to know where I am stepping next ot have a confidence in Him that I can’t understand to beable to live from heaven toward earth to steward my life and my time as I am called to to be the best I can be all the time to be free to be filled to be on fire to set others on fire to cause people to burn to cause people to find their purpose to show people how to find their purpose to jump into storms and stop them to be a revivalist to be a world changer to be an earthshaker and mountain mover and waterwalker and windcatcher and firebreather and a timestopper spacetraveler to defy gravity to travel faster than light to see sound waves to hear colors to have supernatural hearing to have supernatural senses to hear God to hear Him clearly to be able to discern His voice from my own to be able to follow through with what he says to live with the joy set before me in any circumstance to be blessed and be a blessing to find more than 24 hours in a day to be a friend of god to walk with Jesus to surpass God’s expectations to be alive to not be satisfied with temporary victories/breakthroughs/feelings to live from eternity to live for eternity to walk in eternity to steward eternity to know my authority to wlak in my authority grow in stature and favor with God and man to highly esteem everyone to honor all to love those who don’t deserve it to be loved to know the heart of God to be free to not care what others think to have wisdom beyond Solomon to be a more radical lover than david to have more strength than Samson to do greater things as jesus prophecied to become breakthrough for others to know how much power I have to know what weapons are available to see where I should be to see where I am to see where others should be to move in love to speak in love to correct in love to love myself to love as Christ loved to love all to love God to have a single love to have a focused love to have a great love to have an agape love to above all, love to have love as my standard in everything I do.
I figured it out. took me 23 minutes.
What is my true purpose in life?
To live
To die
To jump around
To do nothing
To know people
To watch videos
To entertain myself
To pass time
To eat food
To think of something to do
To change the world to hurt people to make art to make music to judge people to look around to heal people to be free to feel good to hear myself talk to hear other people talk to help others to be different to change the world to be awesome to feel better than yesterday to see god to be god to be the best to be known to make money to have a good job to make money to be successful to eat food to take upsapce to travel to sightsee to give to the poor to hug trees to watch movies to find my purposeto go to bethel to see people get healed to see cancer dissolve to be with God to walk with God to be amazing to to read the word to play games to find joiy to find the woman of my dreams to be able to rest to be able to take a break to know why I am doing this to have all the answers to not be frustrated to constantly know my purpose to know why I am alive to know my direction to constantly know who I am and wha ti stand for to not compromise who I am to live according to who I know I am to change myself for the better to leave behind the things that hinder me from being myself to leave behind the things that keep me from living to leave behind the things that keep me from who I am to become to leave behind the things that distract me from living for a one goal to have a focused burn to burn passionately for one thing to be alive to be filled with hope to be filled with joy to be fully filled to be estatic with praise to see God to encounter him all the time to commune with him all the time to walk with him to know him like enoch to know him like adam to know him like my flesh toknow who he made me to be to know what is store for to know the best for me to know His best for me to know wha ti need to know to walk in who I am to be who I am and no one else to be satisfied with the process to have the peace that surpasses understanding when I don’t understand to be filled and overflowing with the spirit to never hinder the flow of the Spirit through me to walk in the revelations that have bene given to me to be bold to be fearless to have an unshakable unbreakable faith to realize that the spirit realm is more real than the natural to see in the spirit to see what is real to differentiate whwat is real aand what is more real to be able to show other people what I know for the sake of them finding their purpose to not be lost to know where I am and know where I am going to have direction to know where I am stepping next ot have a confidence in Him that I can’t understand to beable to live from heaven toward earth to steward my life and my time as I am called to to be the best I can be all the time to be free to be filled to be on fire to set others on fire to cause people to burn to cause people to find their purpose to show people how to find their purpose to jump into storms and stop them to be a revivalist to be a world changer to be an earthshaker and mountain mover and waterwalker and windcatcher and firebreather and a timestopper spacetraveler to defy gravity to travel faster than light to see sound waves to hear colors to have supernatural hearing to have supernatural senses to hear God to hear Him clearly to be able to discern His voice from my own to be able to follow through with what he says to live with the joy set before me in any circumstance to be blessed and be a blessing to find more than 24 hours in a day to be a friend of god to walk with Jesus to surpass God’s expectations to be alive to not be satisfied with temporary victories/breakthroughs/feelings to live from eternity to live for eternity to walk in eternity to steward eternity to know my authority to wlak in my authority grow in stature and favor with God and man to highly esteem everyone to honor all to love those who don’t deserve it to be loved to know the heart of God to be free to not care what others think to have wisdom beyond Solomon to be a more radical lover than david to have more strength than Samson to do greater things as jesus prophecied to become breakthrough for others to know how much power I have to know what weapons are available to see where I should be to see where I am to see where others should be to move in love to speak in love to correct in love to love myself to love as Christ loved to love all to love God to have a single love to have a focused love to have a great love to have an agape love to above all, love to have love as my standard in everything I do.
Tuesday, July 14, 2009
School of Worship
so. i'll just ramble. cause i'm not really good at organizing my thoughts... hence the point of a blog.
comment on the last post. i've been getting more dreams... you seriously get more and remember them better when you steward them better. Since school of worship i've been getting more, and i've been waking up and typing them out on my beautiful laptop (thanks, Goh). i love this thing. anyhoo, i've had some really interesting dreams like what joseph had. Kris was talking about favor this past month. Joseph had favor with God, but he didn't have favor with people, that's why his parents and brothers were offended. So after i had these dreams i didn't and still haven't told anyone. I don't want people to be offended at what kind of dreams i'm having. I'd rather wait for God to promote me and allow for the favor of man to come in because i have favor with Him.
anyway, so i'm thinking about all this, and then the last day of class, we sang prophetically over each other in voice class. i was recording on my camera everyone singing over each other, and then when someone was about to sing over me, i handed my camera to the guy next to me so he could record. turns out, he didn't record it, but i told him not to worry about it. in the end, he confesses what he did to everyone cause he felt really bad, and then he just gave me prophetic word to make up for it. an then a girl across from me starts giving me word to, and then she says I'm a joseph. and that's it, and it wrecked me...
i think the second sunday we were there was one of the most amazing days ever. we were at firestarters and we got to give words to each other, and it was really encouraging to bless our coach, and it was also good to know that my word was accurate. near the end of the class, i started giving a word to a girl from Tim's table, and she got wacked. after class when we were waiting at hebrews, there was a guy just standing there with his son in a stroller. he had some arthritic condition. i offered to pray for his son, and then gave him a word about a new season of peace and joy. and then he told me his wife's name is joy!
yea way too many things to talk about... sooo many priceless, undescribable moments. i'm glad i captured many of them on video. God give me grace to finish editing them and posting them. need supernatural upload speed!
i think the biggest thing i took from the past month that i'm very intent to walk out is carrying his presence. i was telling jenn this today... but just realizing that I am an open heaven, and that I am the holiest place on this earth (i'm a temple of the HOLY spirit), and that heaven is home. worshiping bigger than the room...
God thank that i have the grace to walk in everything you have called me to walk in.
Thank you that my spirit man receives more than my mind.
Thanks for being an awesome friend. I'd like to hang out more, if you don't mind. You can invade my day anytime, i give you complete freedom to do whatever you want in my life. You can ask me to do anything, cause i want to be in a place where i have purpose and direction and live out my worship.
You're so good...good-er than i can imagine. show me more!
comment on the last post. i've been getting more dreams... you seriously get more and remember them better when you steward them better. Since school of worship i've been getting more, and i've been waking up and typing them out on my beautiful laptop (thanks, Goh). i love this thing. anyhoo, i've had some really interesting dreams like what joseph had. Kris was talking about favor this past month. Joseph had favor with God, but he didn't have favor with people, that's why his parents and brothers were offended. So after i had these dreams i didn't and still haven't told anyone. I don't want people to be offended at what kind of dreams i'm having. I'd rather wait for God to promote me and allow for the favor of man to come in because i have favor with Him.
anyway, so i'm thinking about all this, and then the last day of class, we sang prophetically over each other in voice class. i was recording on my camera everyone singing over each other, and then when someone was about to sing over me, i handed my camera to the guy next to me so he could record. turns out, he didn't record it, but i told him not to worry about it. in the end, he confesses what he did to everyone cause he felt really bad, and then he just gave me prophetic word to make up for it. an then a girl across from me starts giving me word to, and then she says I'm a joseph. and that's it, and it wrecked me...
i think the second sunday we were there was one of the most amazing days ever. we were at firestarters and we got to give words to each other, and it was really encouraging to bless our coach, and it was also good to know that my word was accurate. near the end of the class, i started giving a word to a girl from Tim's table, and she got wacked. after class when we were waiting at hebrews, there was a guy just standing there with his son in a stroller. he had some arthritic condition. i offered to pray for his son, and then gave him a word about a new season of peace and joy. and then he told me his wife's name is joy!
yea way too many things to talk about... sooo many priceless, undescribable moments. i'm glad i captured many of them on video. God give me grace to finish editing them and posting them. need supernatural upload speed!
i think the biggest thing i took from the past month that i'm very intent to walk out is carrying his presence. i was telling jenn this today... but just realizing that I am an open heaven, and that I am the holiest place on this earth (i'm a temple of the HOLY spirit), and that heaven is home. worshiping bigger than the room...
God thank that i have the grace to walk in everything you have called me to walk in.
Thank you that my spirit man receives more than my mind.
Thanks for being an awesome friend. I'd like to hang out more, if you don't mind. You can invade my day anytime, i give you complete freedom to do whatever you want in my life. You can ask me to do anything, cause i want to be in a place where i have purpose and direction and live out my worship.
You're so good...good-er than i can imagine. show me more!
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